Spring showers are in full effect. Summer time will be here before we know it. Many are looking forward to fun in the sun, while some are questioning “Is my summer bod ready?”
Performance, appearance, romantic relationships, and social interactions all have one thing in common – self-confidence. Self-confidence helps individuals reach their goals, stay motivated, and boost overall well-being. Self-confidence is often thought of as a person’s sense regarding their competence and perceived capability to deal effectively with various situations. Self-confident individuals can rise to new challenges, take advantage of new opportunities, and deal with all of life’s difficulties. Self-confident individuals believe they have what is required to succeed causing them to be more self-motivated and more likely to pursue their goals.
When individuals lack self-confidence they may experience a sense of insecurity, self-doubt, ambiguity, and self-conscious. Rather than approaching new situations, their instinct is to withdraw due to fear of failure, ridicule, or incompetence. When lacking self-confidence individuals may appear shy, nervous, and apprehensive. Experiencing low self-confidence can also be associated with positive qualities. Such as, individuals lacking self-confidence typically do not present as arrogant, egotistical, or assuming.
The big question: How to build self-confidence? Self-confidence grows within a spiral pattern. Successful experiences and outcomes lead to a growing self-confidence. The more our self-confidence grows, the more likely we are to take the risk towards additional successful experiences. If we are able to get ourselves into a positive feedback loop, we start growing self-confidence through one experience at a time.
Here are five tips for boosting your confidence:
1. Challenge your inner critic.
Formulate positive self-affirmations that challenge and shift our negative beliefs about ourselves. For example, if we tell ourselves “I am not worthy.” reframe the thought through positive affirmations to “I have just as much worth as anyone else.” If you often tell yourself “I suck at making friends.” Reframe the thought to “I have the ability to make new friends.” It most likely will not feel natural to say positive affirmations that go against what you already believe about yourself; however, through practice saying and thinking these things will become more natural by creating new pathways in your brain that reinforce over time.
2. Affirm your positive qualities.
Practice writing down and reading out loud as many positive qualities you possess that you can think of. For example, you might include “I am kind. I am smart. I am determined.” If you can not come up with a lot to begin with, that is okay. You will begin to recognize more and more positives about yourself as the new pathways become reinforced. These affirmations will allow you to focus on the positive things about yourself that you do like, rather than the negatives opinions of yourself.
3. Reinforce your skills and abilities.
Focus on statements that remind you of your skills. For example, “I am hard working. I am a good friend. I am good at being empathetic towards others.” This will help reinforce confidence in the skills you are good at while reminding you that you were able to build these skills in the past and can build more in the future.
4. Practice self-compassion.
When exploring the negative aspects we believe about ourselves it will crucial to treat ourselves with kindness, recognizing our shared humanity, and being gently mindful. Self-compassion allows us to hold a positive attitude towards ourselves, which aids in allowing for self-confidence.
5. Cultivate self-focused optimism.
Being optimistic involves looking towards the future with hope and positivity. Optimism is consistently linked with positive outcomes and an overall greater well-being. Being more optimistic about ourself and our abilities allows for gaining the confidence we seek. Practice visualizing the best possible version of yourself in the future, focusing on the good things you will do. Imagine yourself reaching your goals successfully and what your life would look like. This helps our minds adjust to the idea of success and allow you to be more confident in pursuing your goals.
Contact Pinnacle Counseling for Help with Healthy Self-Confidence.
No one ever tells themselves “I wish I was less self-confident.” Hopefully, these five tips can help you gain some insight and build some skills that will boost your self-confidence in the long term. If low self-confidence negatively affects your life, reach out to Pinnacle Counseling to meet with a licensed professional. Our compassionate, knowledgeable clinicians can help you navigate your thoughts and give you the tools to live a healthier life.
